My name is Taylor Salvilla Smith. I was born in 1997 and raised in Wise County, Virginia. I grew up in a good home and was active in church.
When I was 7 years old, my parents divorced. That introduced feelings of brokenness, betrayal, anger, and confusion that I did not know how to process. About a year later, the church I grew up in nearly split over my dad continuing to preach as a divorced man. Within one year, I experienced a divorce in my home and a divorce in the church. It only amplified the confusion, bitterness, and brokenness already growing inside me.
Eventually, that brokenness became an inner bondage I could not escape. By 13, I was experimenting with drugs and alcohol, sneaking out, and getting in trouble at school. By 15, I had been expelled from public schools and was living in dependent addiction. I experienced withdrawals, overdoses, and I stole to support my habit. That cycle set the trajectory of my life for the next 11 years.
Juvie turned into jail. Toxic relationships turned into abusive relationships. My life became riddled with chaos, destruction, and addiction. I ruined every meaningful relationship with my family for the sake of a substance. For years, I put them through the constant fear that the next phone call would be the one telling them I was dead.
I began questioning everything: Is life really good? Is God really good? Eventually, those questions became a hatred of living and even existing. I thought that if there was a God, I wanted nothing to do with Him. I ran as far from God as I could, dabbled in occult teachings, and began believing esoteric ideas about myself and the world around me.
As my legal trouble increased, so did the ripping and running, the hiding and surviving. Then one night, I had an encounter with the Lord in my dirty, blasphemous van.
He met me there....
I was confronted with Truth and met by a Love I could no longer deny. Something shifted inside me. During the next 10 months, there was intense spiritual warfare, but there was also a growing desire for something different. I did not like the way I talked or lived anymore. I began feeling conviction about things that had never bothered me before. Although I was facing serious legal consequences, I also had a sincere desire to follow Jesus wholeheartedly.
10 months after that encounter, I entered Recovery Soldiers Ministries.
When I arrived, I weighed 80 pounds. My head was shaved, my life was broken, and I had no hope. But at Recovery Soldiers, I encountered such a tangible expression of God’s love. The people there believed in me, not because of what I could do for them or what was in my pocket, but because they could see the potential of who God had created me to be.
During that year, I learned my identity in Christ and allowed the Holy Spirit to heal parts of me that desperately needed healing. I developed a deep relationship with the Lord and received the discipleship I needed. I learned what it truly means to be a disciple of Jesus. Not just checking religious boxes or following Him for what I could get, but denying my pride and excuses, taking up my cross, and following Him even when it is hard. Jesus is not just the way to a better life... He IS the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Period. In surrendering control, I found the abundant life only He could give me!
Before, my emotions dictated every decision I made. If I was angry, I fought. If I was sad, I stayed in bed. If I was overwhelmed, I got high. Through discipleship, leadership, and the healing work of the Holy Spirit, I learned how to manage my emotions instead of allowing them to manage me.
I grew up tremendously. I learned responsibility, stewardship, how to maintain a job, how to pay bills, and how to care for what God had placed in my hands. I did not only begin thriving spiritually, I was trained to thrive in life.
Now, 3 years later, I am still in awe of what God can paint on a surrendered canvas.
Today, I serve as the Campus Director of Recovery Soldiers Ministries in my hometown of Wise, Virginia. I now have the privilege of giving other women the same message of hope that changed my life: NEW LIFE is possible through JESUS CHRIST.
I no longer wake up every morning fighting and battling addiction or depression. I wake up with purpose, meaning, and hope.
That is why I put my feet on the floor every morning, to offer others the same hope, freedom, and new life I found in Christ!
Find help today →This testimony reflects Taylor’s own experience. Every person’s journey is different.